Him: "Dink."
Me: "You wanna drink?"
Him: "Dah."
Me: "Here you go."
Him (drinking)
Me: "Say 'ta mummy.'"
Him: "Ta mummy."
Him (checking that gravity works on fluids)
Me: "No, no, honey, we don't tip it out."
Him (continuing to test his hypothesis)
Me (taking it off him)
Him: "WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!" (x 2 minutes straight)
Me: "Okay, are you ready to have it back?"
Him: "No!"
Me: "You don't want it?"
Him: "No!"
Me: "Okay."
Him: "NO!!! DINK!!!!!!!" (reaching out for cup)
Me: "Okay, here you go." (handing him cup)
Him: "NO!!!!!!" (slapping it away)
Me: "You don't want it?"
Him: "DINK!" (reaching for cup)
Me: "You want it?"
Him: "NOOOO!!! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!"
And so it goes; me continuing to try and negotiate with an essentially non-negotiable target. Him trying to assert his position of stubborn 'I'll show you mummy for telling me off' while battling with the primal desire to drink. Essentially cutting off his nose to spite his chubby face.
No wonder my sense of humour's wacked. I no longer have any, let alone a firm, grasp on reality.
6 comments:
If it makes you feel any better at ALL - I sometimes have those conversations with my husband....
I think this is really great, it's up there with the best dialogues: 'Plato and Socrates!' 'Job and God!' 'Jenny and Toddler!'
Maybe you should have drunk it yourself, just to spite him ...
Actually, after reading over that post, I'm kind of thirsty myself.
DINK!
Sharpie - I feel not only better, but hugely sympathetic to your plight. Do you have a hubby naughty chair?
TimT - Watch this space for updates on any 'Jenny and Toddler' publishing success. BTW, ever considered a career in comedy?!?!
Hope
I'd love to get money doing comic writing, but I'm terrified of the thought of ad libbing on stage. I'm terrible in front of an audience if I don't have a script to read off.
I wonder ... What's the past tense of 'dink'? Is it 'dunk'?
'Dink, dank, dunk' - it sounds like a pretty accurate description of an evening I spent with my brother a few nights ago ...
I think you'd be awesome at it. We should catch up when I'm in Melbourne for sure.
'Dink, dank, dunk' - sounds like the start of a nursery rhyme to me. Possibly about two brothers' eve of merriment, who knows?
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