Do you remember that episode of Sex in the City where Carrie is horrified to find herself on the cover of a major magazine sans make-up, sans stylish wardrobe and sans dignity?
Welcome to my morning.
Only, my fall from grace will not be broadcast in print, but on television: on a Channel 10 Kids Show, to be precise. Here's what happened:
- a friend of mine who works at the art gallery which cannot be named, asked me to bring my kids in this morning so that they could be the filmed talent for this kids show.
- I, of course, jumped at the chance to have an exciting activity with which to blackmail the kids into good behaviour.
- This plan, of course, backfired when the kids woke up at the crack of dawn this morning, BEGGING me to take them to the gallery right then and there.
- I, of course, proceeded to dress them up to the nines (by my standards, which is not saying much), and in the nagging rush out of the house, stepped out sans make-up, sans funky wardrobe, sans dignity. But no problem, right? They'd only be filming the kids, right?
WRONG.
My most exciting television appearance to date and I'm gonna look like a deshevelled homeless person who's got custody of the kids for the morning.
Why, God, WWWWWHHHHHHYYYYYY????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!
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5 comments:
When I was 13 and living with my folks in the Blue Mountains my mum woke me up one saturday morning and said I had to dress warmly because it was snowing in Blackheath and we were going to drive to see the whole 3 inches of snow.
Being a teenage and before 1pm I refused, but was blackmailed into it.
I couldn't find any gloves so mum says: "Oh, just put your bedsocks on your hands and hurry up, no-one you know is going to see you!".
Mortified, I found myself on National Nine News that evening wearing lint-covered purple bed socks on my hands.
You live and learn, my friend, live and learn.
Louise - Thank you so much for sharing that. Not only did I chuckle heartily at your misfortunate but I actually feel genuinely comforted. Did your mum tape it?
Welcome to television CM. If it doesn't make it to air, at least it will make it to the bloopers tape.
The other time this will see the light of day again, is when they show a "Before they were famous" show.
I was featured on a segment on Today Tonight a week ago (for reasons best not got into here).
I filmed the segment quite early in the day, but after watching the story I really wished I'd gotten up earlier and made a bit more of an effort!
To make things worse, as Anna Coren introduced the story, looking perfectly blonde and manicured, you could see a picture of me superimposed behind her with the most ungainly expression on my face. They must have freeze-framed me when I was in the middle of eating a lemon or something. It looked terrible!
So yeah... don't stress too much!
Everybody seems to have a story about how TV is capturing them in their worst moments. I think it's fairly clear from this - TV hates us. I don't know how it's come to this, but it has.
Well, screw YOU, TV! I'm going to... READ A BOOK! HA!
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